Donut Disturb
by Tomas the Betrayer
Summary: What exactly happened in the Big Donut after Stevonnie made her first appearance?


"But just so you know…"

That mysterious and alluring stranger paused in the doorway to glance back over one shoulder.

"…that isn't a very sound business practice."

The door swung shut, leaving two young employees of the Big Donut with mouths hanging agape. If one word could be used to describe them both at that moment, it would be… 'overcome.'

After a few seconds, gangly Lars swallowed and stuffed both hands in his pockets. "Uhhh…" he mumbled. "Hold down the fort a few minutes, will ya, Sadie? I have to go… use the bathroom."

He was just about to head in back when Sadie grabbed his wrist. "Wait, Lars!" Her colleague looked at her questioningly, causing the stumpy girl to blush and look away. "I, uh… I also need to… y'know… use the bathroom." Her voice had descended to a soft mumble, face glowing red as a cherry cake donut.

He grimaced. "Well, we can't _use the bathroom_ together _…"_ His face took on a slightly confused cast. "…can we?"

"No!" Sadie yelped. "A-absolutely not! We can't."

Lars frowned, feeling uncomfortable. "Look, just wait for me to get done using the… bathroom." He pulled his hand away.

Sadie's head came up wearing an uncharacteristically determined glare. "I don't _want_ to wait, Lars," she spoke in a soft and slightly menacing voice. "I want to use the bathroom _now."_

She made to step past him, and he moved to block her.

"Look, boys don't take as long as girls to… _use the bathroom,_ okay?" he insisted doggedly.

"Well, girls don't have to _use the bathroom_ as often as boys!" she retorted.

"Maybe if girls _did,_ they wouldn't be so uptight all the time!"

"And maybe if boys _didn't,_ they'd be more popular with _girls!"_

The two donut shop attendants glared daggers. They began to circle each other like a couple of lions preparing to pounce.

"I'm _going_ to use the _bathroom_ , Lars!" Sadie hissed.

His shoulders were hunched, arms raised in a classic wrestling pose. "Not before me, you're not!"

For just a moment the opponents held still.

Then without a sound, Sadie launched herself at him, and they both went down in a flailing mass behind the counter. There came the clattering of trays being knocked to the floor, and a short violent struggle. Anyone watching from outside would have only seen the occasional kicking leg and brief glimpse of a toppling body.

All of a sudden Sadie's head rose into view behind the glass display case. Her bared teeth were grinding as she bore down with both hands. A long arm flailed about before finally pushing frantically against her cheek. Being shoved off to one side, Sadie's eye alighted on the donut display. Releasing her hold for a moment she snatched up a bearclaw, only for her wrist to immediately be caught by a skinny grip. They fought against one another for a few moments. Slowly, she gained control, and began to force the huge donut down, disappearing from view as she did.

"No, Sadie, no!" a strangled voice gurgled. "NO, SADIE, NO!"

His pleading was suddenly cut off, transformed into a muffled burbling. Soon after… there was silence.

Sadie rose into view. Breathing heavily, she took a moment to straighten her attire, noting with some annoyance various scrapes and scratches, before striding towards the back of the shop. A door opened and closed. The sound of a lock clicking filled the store.

Time passed.

Bells chimed as Amethyst came stumping into the Big Donut. She peered around briefly at finding no one there, then shrugged and went over to inspect the pastries on display. Crouching down, the Gem scrunched up her face in deep concentration. Sprinkles, or fruity hoops?

All of a sudden, a white-skinned scarecrow jerked up behind the glass, causing Amethyst to jump back with a startled exclamation. Whip half drawn, she realized it was just the human boy. Lars sat upright only to convulse in on himself for a moment. Then with wild energy he stuffed a hand into his mouth, wiggling madly around before finally withdrawing what looked to be a squashed bearclaw.

Lars sucked in a massive gasp of air and sat there panting. He finally noticed Amethyst watching him. The teen stared right back, eyes blank and face sweaty.

Once he had caught his breath, Lars stammered, "I don't… think I need to use the bathroom anymore!"

Slowly Amethyst backed away, exiting the store with the firm resolve never to speak of this incident to anyone.

 _ **FIN.**_


End file.
